Prompts, and it's not a test

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When you’re in a job interview, a podcast interview, a sales call, a meeting… if we take the approach that this is a test and there’s a right answer, we’re not actually engaging and moving things forward.

~ Seth Godin, from Ignore the questions | Seth's Blog

2022-01-28 practice and its not a test

In a conversation, if a guest slips into this-is-a-test mode, things get awkward. If I ask, “what’s something people get wrong about you,” the guest will think I’m looking for dirt, and that I want something they’d not want to share. Or worse, they wonder if I already know something, and suspect I want to drag that skeleton from their closet.

But the sort of conversations I’m interested in creating are ones where those involved are working together to create something interesting and respectful of the subject. So it’s important to create the environment where the guest naturally treats questions as prompts. It turns out that this is easy to do.

If I honestly want the good sort of conversation, then my actions follow automatically. I share things about myself and doing so invites the other person to share. I take things seriously which conveys that I value the interaction and what I’m hearing. I express my interest directly by asking interesting questions; questions which show the other person I’m generally curious. Overall, I demonstrate that I’m listening because I’m interested rather than because I want to do something with what I’m about to hear.

I’m listening to comprehend; not listening to respond nor refute.

ɕ

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@craig I think sharing something about yourself (or more than one thing) during the course of the conversation is part of what helps your guests to relax and chill, to know you’re not “testing” them. I do like the question–“What’s something people get wrong about you?”–and don’t really see anything wrong with giving them a hint, lest they go into test mode.

For instance, I have an interview coming up with a professional organizer and inventory management expert. She told me once, “I’m not Marie Kondo. What we do is so much more than ‘just organizing.’” So that gives me an in.

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@craig - this is a great Seth G quotation that I am adding to my podcast process sheet!

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I have started doing interviews, I think 6 moving on from host on mic. I was wondering if people write down their questions beforehand. I try to research my guest and have 1 questions and then try to take notes as I am listening for the next question because I want to focus on listening and not focus on my next question. Wondering other people’s thoughts on prompts.

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