Transcript for "Authenticity - with Aardhya Tiwari"

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00:00.00
Craig
Hello I’m Craig Constantine welcome this is the podcaster community show short conversations that are not just about podcasting because I like to take the scenic route. Our guest today is Aaradhya Tiwari welcome Aaradhya how are you this…

00:16.80
Aaradhya
Yeah, it’s evening you almost night and I am wonderful I had a good day I went out from the friends I enjoyed the day. So yeah, it’s been a good day for me. How are you.

00:17.20
Craig
Evening you’re way ahead of me.

00:31.72
Craig
I’m good. It’s my late morning coming up on lunchtime I often say people are rolling their eyes who listen a lot. Oh no, he’s going to say the thing about I love that this is even possible that we like literally me and you but just any 2 people that we can have these conversations. Around the world I have 1 this evening theoretically from somebody in New Zealand who got quarantine and his holed up for covid but hopefully they’re doing well but just to be able to find somebody and connect with them and then have a conversation. Um, really I think is very special. Um. You know what would the people from the thirteen hundreds think about this so I know that you have a podcast and the first thing I want to say is congratulations on reaching 17 episodes I think with everybody listening and you and I know that podcasting is lonely like you got to do it all by yourself even when you have a guest There’s a lot. And you’re always thinking should I do this part should I do that? What should I should like I don’t do intro music should I have music should I record. There’s all these pieces and I know for me I’m guessing also for you our drive to make it really good. Can be really challenging. So I guess the first question I have for you is about you. Ah, like you went 10 or 12 episodes and then you started bringing guests onto your show and was that an intentional transition or were you always imagining from the very beginning that you would want to have conversations in the podcast or was it originally and meant to be just your voice or. How did that change occur.

02:05.35
Aaradhya
So The thing was my podcast started as me talking about stories and how they come up and anything and everything I was there was now no such topic in mind because you know stories don’t have a particular topic and for me stories are everything stories like just. Hearing other people’s stories is very different from talking about my own So I had this plan that maybe I can develop some episodes where I am talking about stories so that you know if I’m approaching New people. They would know some sort of they have some sort of idea of what is going to happen here and. You know what do you want to deal with here so that I think that was the basic idea and also there was a little bit of resistance on like going out to people and asking them would you like to come to my podcast because that is a very scary part when you’re just starting out that oh my God What? what did they say? No Oh my God What if this is.

02:57.89
Craig
Um, ah what if they say no who cares like what we.

03:02.64
Aaradhya
Yeah, yeah, now I have got in the high like now I will like Okay, what if they don’t reply. It’s okay, but before you know a beginning in the beginning. You’re just scared of even like doing that posting that episode. Okay I’m going to hit post that is also very difficult.

03:13.81
Craig
Um.

03:19.65
Aaradhya
So I think that was ah how it all evolve from me talking about stories to other people coming here and talking about their stories.

03:29.34
Craig
I’m thinking that there’s I’m not sure if I’ve talked about this on a podcast episode I’m thinking that there’s a similar what writer call it the fear of the blank page and Painters I’ve I’ve read painters talk about just cover the canvas. Just. Get something on there So You’re not looking at blank canvas and because you paint over later if it’s the wrong color and I’m I’m wondering were you? You’re nodding along nobody can hear that but you’re nodding Along. Do you feel like the initial podcasts were your way to just cover the canvas and then. When the world didn’t burn down after you published an episode. You’re like oh all, right? I Guess it’s safe to do this a few more times. Do you feel like those early episodes just got you to just get something up there.

04:11.11
Aaradhya
Yeah, it was like to get the ball rolling because if I wasn’t there to even publish 1 episode then I wouldn’t have done that anyhow like I would it would be a podcast with 0 episodes if I wouldn’t have come out and this thread post so that was like to just get the boil rolling and you know. Just you know, just like you said painting the canvas something things just going out there and just typing something just like stories. You know when you’re writing something and you’re just at a writer’s block. You are said write at least something this go ahead and write blabber shit. You just go ahead and do something and that’s it. And that’s the I think that’s how my podcast started as well I will like I can just write something. It doesn’t have to be perfect I can record that and that’s it and no, it’s not like first episode people are going to come on and like you know, criticize it for ah how you know how not perfect. It is so I think that’s how first episode came out with. Me not obsessing over the perfection part of it and just like you know I’m going to hit post. That’s it I’m running a way after this.

05:15.12
Craig
Um, have you found you? You mentioned the perfectionist and I totally understand I have the same. It’s almost obsessive compulsive the the drive to well I could I could make this better I could I could do a better job of this I could fix this piece I could change that piece I could have transcripts all these things I could do um.

05:25.15
Aaradhya
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

05:34.69
Craig
You find that that’s come back around so it sounds like you kind of got that monster under control and then when you brought in people for conversations did the monster come back. But now it’s got like a new face or a new set of horns or something.

05:44.75
Aaradhya
Yeah, So it’s like when I’m doing podcast interviews with people I Some somewhat know like people who are maybe I have known from a narrative drawn from a friend so they are people have convosed ah for like onces or twice for them. It’s like okay they. People I know I can I can do this I can get a good podcast out of them and I don’t have to make it perfect because it’s going to be a conversation and then it just goes on very smoothly. You know the resistances isn’t coming that much. But when I am going out to take an interview of a person I.

06:05.90
Craig
Um.

06:20.32
Aaradhya
Barely know just by that like I’ve only seen their social media or I’ve only seen their you know website and all then oh my God The perfection is unreal I’m like oh maybe I should write down some questions. Maybe I should do this? Maybe I Maybe I should ask them if they’re comfortable with it or not and there’s a. So much questioning going around until it happens and then it’s just like okay just let it go and do it Now. It’s now and ever and if it fucks it up and then it fucks it up that just no. Going back here from here and after that Also when the editing part comes in so now I’ve stopped editing I’m like let it be real. Let it be just let it. This is what a conversation is like you don’t you could just don’t cut out a conversation. So now. It’s just real and. What I have what I am hearing people are going away So That’s it. That’s where it goes.

07:15.54
Craig
Ah, you’re talking my language now the idea that um I don’t actually I actually don’t hear a lot of people talk about how do I make my podcast sound authentic people figure out pretty quick. Well the way to sound authentic is to just be yourself like you know I’m.

07:27.66
Aaradhya
Um, yeah.

07:34.43
Craig
I’ve always wondered what would happen if I tried to do I have a few different shows and I’ve done some different work but it’s all basically the same version of me. It’s just me like doing my oh that’s interesting. Let’s let’s talk about this and I’ve always wondered what would happen if I tried to do something very different like if I tried to.

07:51.24
Aaradhya
Huge.

07:54.70
Craig
I Don’t know come across in audio as a tiny person like I don’t know how I would do that I have to change my entire personality to so like it and it you’re laughing because it doesn’t fit what you’re looking at but have you ever have you ever thought about what I was going to say what sort of.

08:11.84
Craig
Persona you wanted to convey or had you always thought at I’m just Goingnna it’s gonna be transparent just gonna be me.

08:17.50
Aaradhya
You know the thing was ah when I started with podcast. The first idea was doing a marketing podcast. So I’ve been always been you know centered towards how marketing is and I would read said courtdens this is marketing and all that.

08:29.61
Craig
And.

08:34.49
Aaradhya
And I am a business um business commerce major so you know that just was like the basic art. Okay, like just started marketing because maybe you know some of it so you can start with it then halfway through it I’m realizing. It’s not me that okay I know this I know this stuff and I can talk about it. But am I really liking this am I really into this than that you know that contemplation just led me to believe that if it’s not the real me if it’s not something I love to do then it won’t be authentic enough to actually go forward with it. And that’s when I you know I stopped that podcast I think it had like 10 episodes 10 episodes and I was like okay I’m done with this I need to start something where where I can be real I can just talk I can just blaber and it would make sense and that’s how you know Laa’s podcast came forward and I had no plan of like what I’m going to do there what I’m going to talk about because it was like I am going to converse with the people so that’s it that was the basic idea and that I think that just made it real that has made it genuine because I had no plan and I had’t think you I have to act like this. Have to like be like that because that’s where what I’m approaching you for that’s what I’m approaching the listeners for that. This is what you’re getting here. arahari yoerathha and yeah the guest will get that too.

09:59.97
Craig
I Think that’s the best way that I’m I’m nodding along while you’re talking I think that’s the best way to approach it. That’s how I do it hey here it is um, do you find that like I’m I’m wondering about like where I’m looking I Wonder what you find challenging.

10:01.56
Aaradhya
This isn’t.

10:19.24
Craig
Do you find that conversations are are easier or harder or there’s no difference if you get a conversation partner that you don’t agree with like you know sometimes people ah like podcasters like doesn’t happen to meet but I could say oh I have a hard time when the guest disagrees with everything I say that’s not. My personal situation but that could happen I’m wondering if you’ve experienced the different kinds of conversations that challenge you and maybe you don’t want to go toward those conversations or you do go toward them.

10:45.52
Aaradhya
Um, I mean fortunately unfortunately maybe I have don’t approach those kind of people that you know I contradict perspectives with yet like it might be that I am not that. Well forced in that kind of topic and ah you know the person is like very knowledgeable in that and I am just lost I’m at a loss of words a word to say to that person. But there’s also a thing out perspective that not everybody is going to have the same perspective as me and you know and that’s okay because. I Think that just what makes the conversation interesting and you know carry it forward effortlessly because there are times where the person I’m interviewing would say things that I might not agree with or maybe there’s something that I might change about it. But. Accepting that and acknowledging that perspective really makes a difference because then you’re like okay I get you and that is a very different perspective you like put in the picture so that I think really makes a low whole lot of difference in the conversation that okay there are people I agree with but they are people I don’t and that I think is The. You know a sense of a conversation where people are coming around and they have different perspective different views and different opinions and they can talk freely about it without any kind of judgment.

12:09.11
Craig
Are you also a podcast listener like do you particularly follow certain kinds like what are some? What are some like give me a I want to say if there’s this painter who like does point a list. You know, just give me some random points of like.

12:26.49
Aaradhya
Okay, so I mostly listen like those positive and you know the self self loveve and you know self-a awarenessreness podcast. There’s a this podcast. My friend does it called Pinch of Positivity with like you know, just accepting yourself and.

12:27.12
Craig
I Really like to listen to and I don’t like to listen to and.

12:45.10
Aaradhya
Being positive about about everything around you being grateful and there’s aoling podcast I listen to that’s also a friend of mine name mostly listen to my and there’s ah, there’s Ted Goden’s podcast I’ve listen to that as well. Tim Ferriss

12:54.60
Craig
That’s good point.

13:01.13
Aaradhya
So Yeah I listen to podcast time to time and not ah I won’t say I want like a very keen listener who does that every day. But yeah I do listen to those podcasts because I I like to listen to things that make me feel good and like you know I feel that I am am gaining something from it. So yeah, That’s what I go for.

13:20.96
Craig
I Like the phrase listening listening to feel good like want to listen to things make me feel good and sometimes I do that mostly I listen to things because I’m I’m passionately curious so I want to I want to hear the conversation with a person that I can’t get a hold of and like oh you know like I call it like skip conversations I can’t talk to.

13:23.91
Aaradhya
Yeah.

13:40.84
Craig
That person but I can listen to the person who talked to that person. Um, so that it’s it’s interesting. Always yeah I find it’s always interesting to hear what other podcasters do um to sort of energize and find ideas. So are there other things you do you literally? you’re going to say something.

13:53.66
Aaradhya
Yes. Other things I do as in like in port.

14:00.59
Craig
Yeah to recharge like and you know like me I say oh I go for a walk like I’ll go out and perambulate you know and then come back like where’s my pen I got to write this stuff down. Do you walk? Do you exercise like what is it that you do to recharge.

14:13.49
Aaradhya
I Mean for you know for that imagination and for the for those creative juices I think I I mostly go out and observe I would just go out and sit down and at a place and I was just you know observe people will observe around me or ah like the things that are happening and there’s this.

14:32.74
Aaradhya
Small small things that we don’t realize we just you know pass by and when we are like ah so busy with life. So when I’m like okay maybe I I just I can just go out and sitter sit and eat something and just look at people that’s like I think my best past time. Because then I can get those imagination flowing and write stories and I that’s I carry my phone everywhere. So I just open the notes app I have an item like I’m writing this down before I forget it. So I think that ah really works out because. Anytime anytime of the Dm is writing in my phone. Okay I don’t want to forget this. Let just type it down.

15:13.28
Craig
I Think that’s a very wise I’ve I’ve heard other people describe what you’re describing as something called sit spotting like you know I’m sitting in one spot and I’m looking at other people. Um, and.

15:28.99
Craig
But more generally it’s mindfulness practice to just sit and be mindful of what’s going on instead of moving mindlessly through one’s day and I don’t know if you’ve done enough conversations yet for the podcast. This might be a little bit early to ask this question but do you find that doing that helps you like are you getting.

15:47.34
Craig
Better at observing the conversation and observing the person you’re talking with.

15:50.55
Aaradhya
Yeah I mean that like talking to more people definitely helps a lot in podcast particularly because sometimes they are things that you don’t observ like realize until you have done that and in podcast it was the same for me like when I started taking yesterday was I was like very nervous and.

16:10.47
Aaradhya
And Jitry and you know I used to write so many questions and at the end I would realize that it could didn’t even have to ask so many and we could have just you know kept the conversation flowing like it was and I Just you know that that just breaks the rhythm and then slowly I realize maybe I to even don’t need. Ah. Question to start with I can just you know, go on with the court like just how it would be like I am meeting a person in real life would I write down a question and then go ask them that no I won’t So then why would I am I doing it here. So I think that is something I’ve learned. You know in this journey of taking guest interview with we now I don’t plan things like ah like ah you know Micromanage things Beforehand I’m just you know your low kind of situation. So I’m going there and I’m like yeah okay, let’s do this. We are going to see what’s going to happen next.

16:56.80
Craig
Um I have heard heard yolo at ages because yet that tendency had used more in real life I had ah a close friend. We were in a big city and and she was like we were trying to cross the street and she’s like Yolo and just went out in the traffic and I was like oh like whoa you only live once. Maybe literally if you walk out into a traffic. Nice nice. You nice Yolo drop. Do you? Um I love that you’re talking about not writing down questions and I because I don’t do that I have a giant piece paper in front of me. But it’s a giant checklist. It’s not you know material that I’ve written.

17:27.63
Aaradhya
Yeah I do that to yeah I mean writing things down to the person if there that makes a lot of difference other than you know, practicing things Beforehand doesn’t really help and I used to do that report. So yeah.

17:41.55
Craig
Yeah, it’s not the same experience. My personal experience of me standing in front of a mirror like this is what I’m going to say doesn’t make doesn’t carry through. Yeah I’m busy panicking. Um, yeah, oh so many good things. Ah, let’s see how about.

17:49.96
Aaradhya
Doesn’t go that that way it doesn’t go that way.

18:01.20
Craig
Um I don’t know is there anything else’s top of mind for you or questions that you had.

18:04.89
Aaradhya
Mean ah, yeah, just talking about you know the how preparation and how do you come forward with podcasts and all so like you know so before I used to think that you know the podcast should be know very long and. You know it should be very you have to chat with the person for a long time to really understand what they’re talking about. But then I realized maybe you know the person is going to focus on 1 question only like maybe I can ask them something and they’re going to go talk about that and when you when then I realize the real life situation. Like if I’m meeting that person in real life and I have only a limited time. Are you going to talk about 10 topics or are you gonna focus on one. So that’s how I think that’s like how I evolved through it that okay that person is sitting with you in real life. You’re having coffee. What are you going to do. Are you going to bombard them with questions but you going just be like okay just tell me about yourself. What’s up. What’s going on. So I think that just helps a lot and I know gaining that confidence as well.

19:04.86
Craig
Yeah, how’s that coffee right.

19:17.87
Craig
Terrific I Always hate to say it. But I think that’s a great place to stop? Um I think you’re going to be doing great things I’ve listened to a couple episodes and I think you’re well on your Way. So I Wish you the best of luck and I would would normally say have a great day except it’s. Soon time they go to sleep So have a great tomorrow. Thank you for taking the time to join me.

19:35.25
Aaradhya
Um, thank you so much. Thank you! It was a wonderful conversation and so yeah, it was wonderful.