# The effort to know others

**URL:** <https://forum.podcaster.community/t/the-effort-to-know-others/4344>\
**Category:** Workbench\
**Created:** [September 25, 2024, 2:01pm UTC](https://forum.podcaster.community/t/the-effort-to-know-others/4344 "2024-09-25T14:01:01Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 1\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![craigconstantine](https://yyz2.discourse-cdn.com/flex030/user_avatar/forum.podcaster.community/craigconstantine/32/2322_2.png) [@craigconstantine](https://forum.podcaster.community/u/craigconstantine)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2024, 2:01pm UTC](https://forum.podcaster.community/t/the-effort-to-know-others/4344/1 "2024-09-25T14:01:01Z")

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Let’s bend relationship advice to apply to podcasting: Feeling stuck in a rut with your podcasting? Go have a conversation with a guest where your entire intention is to be of service to them.

> The asymmetry between wanting to know others and being known by them presents an inherent problem, because relationships require reciprocity: If I don’t do the work to know you deeply, a relationship doesn’t form in which _you_ will know _me_. This vicious cycle—Poe syndrome again—is made much worse when you are lonely to begin with […] In other words, if no one knows you well and you are thus lonely, that may make you more self-focused and less interested in others, making it much less likely for others to want to get to know you well. ~ Arthur C. Brooks, from [Why It’s Nice to Know You](https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2024/05/happiness-knowledge-edgar-allan-poe/678530/)

Question: What would happen, if your intention with a podcast episode, was to help some else’s well-being— if your intention was _only_ to demonstrate to them that you care? What if you go into it hoping for nothing for yourself?

So **not** an intention of, “ **I want** to know X, so I’ll ask good questions.”

But rather, “I think **they’d enjoy** talking about X, so I’ll ask good questions.”

Answer: It’s totally amazing. It alters your own life. You should go do it 500 times.

(Wether or not you turn those conversation into podcasts is irrelevant of course.)

ɕ